The Lost Monkey

Sigh...it's been tough lately.

I've really lost the passion for coding.
When before 18-hour, adrenaline-fueled, total-focus coding sessions were the norm, now I struggle to get through one simple program.

What is it? Am I tired? Burnt-out? Have I lost the passion?

Usually your passion is the stuff you'll do even if nobody paid you to do it.
Which is/was true of coding. Many a weekend and late nights were devoted to learning new programming languages and libraries, improving my code-fu and hacking programs just for the heck of it. I read beautiful code, rejoicing in their elegance.

Now, I'm getting paid to do what I should love to do. So, why is it I dread firing up my IDE? Have I got old and rusty? Has my time lost in IBM processes taken away my zeal? Money doesn't seem to motivate me. What then will?

I don't know. For now, I'll code because I have to, not because I want to. It's a sad, difficult time to be. The passion is lost.

The monkey is depressed.